SPANK BANK ALERT: this week I’m filming an episode for the second season of Peter Helliar‘s funny and sweet show It’s A Date.

In it I get to work with dat crazy gay, Miss Joel Creasey. We even might make out a bit. Maybe.

I’m having a lot of fun dicking about and pretending to be an actor. You’ll be able to see the ep on your telly towards the end of this year.

Excited to let you know that I’m coming back to triple j!

Whilst John Safran and Father Bob are consciously uncoupling for a few weeks, they’re very kindly letting me back on the airwaves to harness one of the greatest and most powerful tools in any modern liberal democracy: TALKBACK RADIO.

Join me on Sunday nights from 9pm for Chatback – the show where you get a voice and then that voice is broadcast right across Australia for some reason and everyone has to listen to it.

I’ll be like your Alan Jones and you’ll be like my wrinkly-but-enthusiastic listenership. We want to hear your opinions (informed or otherwise), your stories, your feedback, your hopes and your dreams (but not your poetry). You can call in to the show on 1300 0555 36, text in on 0439 75 7555 or fully tweet in with the hashtag #chatback.

I’m sure all the people on air will be perfectly normal and real and not silly at all. There won’t be any silly calls, nosiree.

Here’s the first week’s episode:

Ooooh me weary bones! So weary! So boney!

And all from travelling all over the country with the Melbourne International Comedy Festival Roadshow. Thank you so very much to those of you who made it along to the shows; they’ve been the absolute best and poncing about telling dick jokes is a pretty cool way to see this very nice country, from the charmingly barren main street of Yass to the flotation tanks of Wollongong to the superpits and sex workers of Kalgoorlie.

I have two stops left on my Roadshow experience:

Goulburn NSW – Friday June 27th, bookings here

Nowra NSW – Saturday June 28th, bookings here

If you’re around those places, I’d love to see you there. If not HEY WHATEVER I’LL LIVE.

I’d also like to give a shout out to my fellow Roadshow travellers for the WA leg. Yes we’re comedians and we’re all about making people laugh on stage, but I honestly don’t think I’ve ever laughed as much over a two-week period offstage with these fucking delightfully mental people. They’re all such funny and lovely folks and I have to say I’ve been pretty damn proud that an all-local show has been able to be so strong and appealing to audiences across regional Straya.

I’d really encourgae you to check out their stuff online and keep an eye out for them come comedy festival time please thank you muchly:

Anne Edmonds

Nick Cody (recording his debut DVD in Sydney on July 3rd! Highly recommended!)

Luke Heggie 

Kevin Kropinyeri

It’s done! I finished up the tour of my 2014 stand up show UnAustralian(ish) in Perth over the weekend to a charmingly drunk and laugh-y crowd at the Mt Lawley Bowling Club.

I did the show 52 times across the festivals in Adelaide, Brisbane, Melbourne, Sydney and Perth and have had a joyous time doing it. I’m really proud of the show and really thankful to all of you who made the effort to come out and see it.

Leaving triple j breakfast last year was really pretty scary for me, but I feel profoundly lucky to have you folks out there who are supporting my stand up and it’s nice to know that (at least this year) I won’t be living in my car any time soon.

It’s particularly nice to know that because I don’t own a car.

I also want to say a special thanks to those of you who at the end of the show chipped in some dosh for the brilliant people at Welcome To Australia. Across the 5 cities you kindly donated $6409.35 to help asylum seekers, refugees and other recent arrivals have a better life in this country. That is way, way cool. I thank you, and so do they.

I’m now off on the road with the Melbourne Comedy Festival Roadshow (we might be coming to your town! Wow!) and working on trying to stick my fat fingers into various pies. I’m writing a bunch of new jokes for you, you might see me pop up on a certain scripted TV show in the not-too-distant future and I’m hoping to begin eating better and maybe – just maybe – exercise up to once a week. 

Exciting times, people…